Soy ... bean? milk? una Peruana?

That's right, friend(s). I'm leaping into the giant invisible net otherwise known as "Peru." Or more appropriately, God. Abba. Daddy. Jesus. Holy Spirit.

But physically, I'll be in Peru. For approximately 2.5 months. Hooray!

I've been praying and praying and praying for guidance in this whole shindiddly. And honestly, before finding out about Peru was SO excited about the possibility of going there and wondering if that's the door God was going to open. Like an anxious school girl who's excited to be in class with her crush and stares at him until he looks at her and then she quickly looks away... but then coyly (creepily) turns her gaze back to see if he's still looking. Or... me in 7th grade. That's a different story.

But you know what I mean? Antsy. Excited. Waiting anxiously to see if this could really happen.

And it is! As soon as I found out, I was in shock. Still kind of am in a state of shock. As the details unfold, it's becoming more real. And yet even in the midst of this amazing opportunity, fear and doubts and questions are sneaking in. Really, I'm pretty fed up with doubting God these days. I prayed, "God... I can't stand all of this doubt and fear anymore. It's like I'm not really living when I'm not trusting You." Yet when and as I trust Him, He fills me with all joy and peace in Him (Romans 15:13). Literally, it's the sweetest thing.

He said something sweet to me today. Not an affirmation with big, bright flashing lights saying "Lauren, you're on the right path! Congratulations for selecting correctly!" No, no, no. It was far more subtle than that. Spoken gently, quietly, and saying something else entirely. I was reading Galatians 2, and in Galatians 2:19-20 it says:

¹⁹ “For through the law I died to the law so that I might live for God. ²⁰ I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. "

I felt a tug to pause and meditate on these verses. And then came "Live by Me." "Yes, Daddy," I returned, and after a moment of praise, began to write these two verses down in my journal. After writing them, I saw that He had spoken directly from His word (check out the bold above). Amazing.

Yet still I prayed, "Okay, but am I on the right path??" No answer. Yet SO much affirmation and excitement when praising Him for who He is. A loving Father, not a trickster judge/dictator. So He shows something to me - everything in this life will come and go, but only He remains the same.

So if I go to Peru or Serbia, or love or hate a job, or lose or make a friend, or stub my toe or burn my toast or have a good hug, it all will begin and have an end. It will all come to pass, and I won't think of it every day for the rest of the days of my life. But what, or Who, I will think about is our loving Father in heaven, who gave His one and only Son for me. And you.

So leaping into the giant invisible net of Peru is a whole lot more like leaping into His hands. And asking and growing and being with Him. In 3 months, I plan to come back to the States, and who knows what will happen then? Another job, opportunity, open door, closed door. Good times, hard times, somewhere in-between times. Life will happen, and He will be right there walking with me through it.